Happy New Year

This is my first post of 2010! And with it comes good news and well, maybe a little not so good news, too.

Since the last time I wrote, Johnny has had a PET/CT scan, an MRI, and a colonoscopy. Seriously, this dude knows how to party!

OK, so lets get the "not-so-good" news out of the way. The MRI results showed worsening of the liver. On the last scan there were two lesions. This scan showed a total of six lesions. What does this mean? We really don't know yet. It could just be that the lesions were "immature" and didn't enhance on the previous scans. I look at it like when you plant seeds -- they are in the ground and have to eventually bloom. Perhaps the cancer cells were there on the previous scan and just hadn't "bloomed" yet. I plan on asking Dr. Ansari about this theory on Wednesday.

Also, the lymph nodes continued to be clear. This tells me that there wasn't any more traveling to regions unknown. This also increases my confidence that the liver issues will be handled with surgery.

Now the really good news. Johnny's colonoscopy showed DRAMATIC improvement. On the previous study (at diagnosis) the tumor had almost completely obstructed the colon, and the tumor itself was approximately 6 inches long. On today's study, Dr. O'dea was jubilant when he came in to give me the results. When you compare the previous pictures with the current pictures it is amazing! The remaining lesion is only about 1/3 of an inch wide and one inch long. Dr. O'dea said that now it basically appears to be an ulcer that looks benign. However, since we know that is where the center of the primary cancer was located, it would make sense to have it removed regardless of the results from the tissue samples (biopsy).

So, where do we stand with things now? Well, we see Dr. Ansari on Wednesday and he will (hopefully) answer the millions of questions that I have come up with since the re-staging process began. We will meet Dr. House in Indianapolis on Tuesday, January 12th and finalize our plan for surgery. Again, I have a million questions that I will be asking in Indianapolis, too.

As you might just imagine, after the news about the liver I had a moment of temporary implosion. I am still terribly worried about it, but Johnny has a very unique way of talking through things with me that can get me refocused and calmed down. How pitiful that he has to do that when he is the one going through so much -- but we are a good team like that. I am so thankful that his attitude and outlook have been positive since he was diagnosed. He is an amazing guy.

~~~~

This past weekend we went to Boyne Highlands in Petoskey, Michigan for a little getaway. Jim and Molly, Dan and Aida, all our kids and a two other Niles families (Hi, McKeel's and Stephensons!) went to snowboard and tube. How FUN! It was just the weekend we were looking for. Fun in the snow, hot tub and sauna and big beautiful rooms with fireplaces! It was wonderful but entirely too short.

Unfortunately on the way home from Petoskey, we came upon an accident that had just happened and I got out to see if I could help. Without getting graphic, let me just say that it was the worst trauma scene I have ever experienced. The dad (Brad - 37 years old) died at the scene and I stayed with the wife until help arrived and they could be extracted from the SUV. Their two small children (18 months and approximately 3) had to be removed through the rear window. The children and wife were basically uninjured, but the husband probably died from severe head trauma. As we waited for help, the wife (Julie) spoke very calmly and told me that she was a medical professional (physical therapist, as was her husband) and she knew that his injuries weren't recoverable. My heart broke as I watched her say goodbye to him. I was struck with how fleeting life really is. There are no guarantees, are there? She had no idea when she woke up on Sunday that it would be his last day. I prayed for them the entire rest of the way home and through most of the night.

I also thanked God for the many blessings I have received in my life. When you lay awake at night and just start thinking through what you have been given, it is surprising what you can come up with! I ran the gamut from my daisy flowered dress in Kindergarten, to my first puppy, to my friend Ruthy who used to play Squad 51 with me, along with about a million other random thoughts. Of course all of the important stuff made my list, too.

I just feel overwhelmingly thankful right now.

This is going to be my New Year's Resolution -- to be thankful every single day for the important AND random. The big and the small. The obvious and the obscure.

It is going to be a great year.