Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Tuesday again

For not knowing what to expect from the increased dose of 5-FU, I think Johnny has managed quite nicely, thank you very much.

He was pretty nauseated last night and was quite restless until about 2 a.m. I think all the bedtime meds finally kicked in and he then got some peaceful sleep. The 5-FU pump grinding away all night drove me nuts . . . I swear they gave us the loudest one they have!

The remainder of the day Johnny has spent in bed, smelling like a baby and sleeping away. I definitely think he is sleepier this time than before. Fortunately, he hasn't needed extra medicine for nausea so that is a plus.

Basically today in a nutshell goes something like this: wake up, take the boys to school, come home, smell Johnny, do some laundry, give Johnny drugs, more laundry, clean, smell Johnny . . . blah, blah, blah. It is really boring when Johnny is sleeping, but I'll take boring knowing that he is doing OK.

OK, so I know this has been the most boring post ever but I am happy that there isn't much to report. I will be going to bed very early tonight and am considering ear plugs so I don't hear the pump.

Please say your prayers tonight and include us. We believe in MIRACLES of all shapes and sizes and we know that prayers can make that happen.

Happy Birthday, Angel Ava. We know you are the sweetest of all of the littlest angels in heaven. I know you are well loved in heaven and on earth you are always in our hearts.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Birthday Wishes

Thanks to everyone for sending me the great birthday wishes. It is great to be 42 -- again!

There are so many things that I would normally ask for on my birthday, you know the normal stuff like a robin's egg blue box from Tiffany's or a day at the spa or (another) trip to someplace warm and tropical. . . but that was before.

It is amazing how "things" just don't mean as much anymore (WAIT! If you have already sent the Tiffany box, I'll accept it!). This morning my first thought wasn't that it was my birthday. It was about Johnny's cancer and his increased dosage for chemo today. My next thought was what to do with Jake since he needed to stay home from school with a tummy bug. My next thought was getting Quinn to school on time and with a nice warm breakfast in his belly. It wasn't until I was drying my hair that I thought, "Oh, wait. . . it's the 28th, isn't it?" Just another day, really.

I did sent up a little prayer to God this morning when I realized that it was my b-day and asked that if I could be so bold, I would like to know that things are going to be OK. I wasn't really asking for a thunderbolt or an alien spacecraft to spell it out in the sky, just maybe something subtle, you know. I kept an eye peeled and my ears perked for the "sign".

When we got to Dr. Ansari's he walked in the exam room looking dapper as always and the first words out of his mouth were, "The CEA is down to 7.9." SEVEN POINT NINE. Boo-Yah! I took that as my sign. Thanks, God. That was every birthday present for the rest of my life wrapped up in one sentence. I'll take it as fair trade.

Dr. Ansari was impressed with the number and reminded us that "normal" is five. Five, as in two-point-nine less than where we stand right now.

The decision was made to boost the chemo dose anyway, since the lab values indicated that it was safe to do so. I said it before, and I'll say it again: Cancer doesn't know who it is dealing with! You cannot mess with the Fighting Toad! I will say, though, that Johnny's isn't feeling well right now, and with this increased dosage I anticipate a rough night for him. Please pray for this to not be the case, but we will tackle what ever this nasty 5-FU hands us.

While over the course of the last six chemo cycles, we have met some of the nicest people. Chemo Mondays are dreaded (even by Johnny, he admitted yesterday) but seeing the Monday "regulars" makes the time spent in the lounger go by quickly. Two ladies, May and Carol, have become quick friends and we enjoy chatting the time away with them. There are others we have met and continue to pray for as well. It is a special community in that infusion center. People share fears and concerns, hopes and helpful hints. A very unique bond forms, and forms quickly. I know it has changed us, as I'm sure it has the others that spend hours infusing away.

So, for the rest of my birthday I will be thankful for the gift of a low CEA level for my Johnny. I also look forward to turning 43 and celebrating life without cancer with the love of my life and the boys. Now that is a gift that will keep on giving!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Holy Wah! Escanaba was GREAT, eh!

For those of you able to attend the Escanaba in Da Moonlight performance on Thursday night: Thank you! For those unable to attend, I have to tell you, you missed an incredible night filled with fantastic entertainment. I hate to admit, but I wasn't quite expecting the quality of performance that was presented. By intermission my cheeks hurt from laughing so hard. It felt so good to be able to laugh out loud next to Johnny and surrounded by so many of our friends. They even challenged Johnny to chug some of their leftover "Mooseball Milkshake" after the performance. You'll have to ask Johnny about the "protein chunks" some time.

And to Stephanie Stowe Salisbury: Thanks from the heart of our bottoms and the bottoms of our hearts. This was just exactly what we needed at just the right time. You and all of the actors/actress created something special on stage that we will not soon forget. "Holy Wah!"

Next in line for The Fighting Toad event calendar is the golf outing, Saturday, October 10th. I may start sounding like a broken record here, but WOW are there a lot of prizes. Seriously, even if you don't golf you should come out to Hampshire Country Club just for the raffle. I'm not sure of the total, but I know for sure there are 6 or 7 prizes with values over $500!

And if you do golf you really need to get your registration sent in soon (or at least call to reserve your spot). As of Thursday there were already 45 teams signed up (!) and we have been told that the course only has enough golf carts to accommodate 60 teams. So, quick like a bunny, send in your registration.

I would love to post a list of all the prizes being offered, but I don't want to ruin the surprise. I guess you'll just have to join us that day to find out! It is still not too late to offer your volunteer services. Please call Larry Larson or email him (see info on the registration form) if you are interested in helping on October 10th.

The Brawley Family Fish Fry is also fast approaching. I have had so many friends from out of town call to let us know they will be joining us. I can't tell you how excited that makes me!

The BFFF will be at the Eagle's Lodge in downtown Niles (across from the Riverfront Cafe) from 12 noon on Friday, October 16th, until 8 pm. We had to extend the hours due to expected high numbers of people. Evidently, Johnny Brawley knows a lot of people around here that like to eat fish! We are looking for volunteers for this event as well. If you are willing to help out, please call my wonderful crazy MIL, Ginger, and she will assign you a task and a time. Please reach her by calling 269-683-9001. There will be additional prizes raffled off at this event as well.

I'm going to need a vacation when all of these events are finished! We are really being kept busy by all of this stuff! But it is a happy kind of busy, so we really don't mind.

Monday is a big day. Johnny is a bit anxious about what the new dose of chemo will do to him and how his body will respond. I just hope the Emend will still hold the nausea/vomiting in check for him. Just in case it doesn't, I've been reading up on some other options (meds) for nausea control. There are several tricks still left for us to try, and I am not afraid to call the office and ask for more help if Johnny needs it.

I am just happy that after treatment on Monday we will be half way through with chemo and should start to look for surgeons (I would think, anyway). I think it is kinda crappy that my birthday (WOOT!) has to be spent worrying about Johnny's new chemo dose, but I just feel like this will entitle me to a nice warm tropical birthday celebration next year when Johnny has officially kicked the booty of this nastiness we call cancer.

Side note about my birthday: On Monday I will be 42. Funny thing is, I thought I was going to be 43. At some point during this past year, I started saying that I was 42 and evidently I believed myself enough to confuse the be-jeebies out of me when my birthday started approaching. I said something about being 43 not too long ago to Johnny, and he said, "I'm 43, you have to be 42." Hey, he's right! What a pleasant surprise, I get to be 42 all over again!

I hope that because I haven't been preaching about prayer that nobody has been taking a break from it. If you have, that's OK but please start up again. I want Monday to be as smooth as possible for Johnny and I would love it if the nausea and vomiting don't become an issue with the new dosage.

Thanks for keeping our whole family in your prayers. We don't take it lightly, believe me. Prayer is some powerful stuff, people, and we want to put it to good use on Johnny. Pray along with me, will you?

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Some Thoughts on HOPE

  • Hope has the power to fill our lives with happiness.
  • Hope sustains us through despair.
  • We learn to cultivate hope the same way we learn to walk: one step at a time.
  • Hope teaches that there is reason to rejoice even when all seems dark around us.
  • There is never anything false about hope.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Busy, busy, busy






There you go, Uncle Ricky . . . pictures of Quinn's bear just like I promised! :O}










It is crazy how busy a family can be once school starts up, isn't it? Today was a divide and conquer kind of day.

My mom and dad picked the boys up from school, brought them home so that Jake could get his soccer uniform and gear, gave them a snack and then took Quinn to the Jr. High. Johnny's 7th grade football team had a game at Ring Lardner (which they won!) so Quinn and Johnny stayed in town. Then, they took Jake to Dowagiac for his soccer game. In the mean time, I finished up at work (thanks, Dennis for doing the late case! and my bestie, Laurie Lou for covering call for a while!) and drove to Dowagiac to catch up with Jake and the rest of the spectators. Of course, once I got to the stands to watch the game it started raining. Yuck. (Thanks Mom and Dad for all of your help!)

We all finally made it home around 8 p.m. where chaos ensued until snacks were eaten (again), homework finished up, showers taken, teeth brushed, etc and the boys finally got to bed around 9:15. Pretty good for all they had to accomplish.

While they were running helter skelter around the house, I was putting the finishing touches on the raffle tickets for the many, many prizes being offered at the golf outing and fish fry. Seriously, people -- you cannot believe all the prizes. We really know a lot of great people!

Just to whet your appetite here are just some of the prizes: a 7-day Ohio bow hunt, a Lake Michigan charter for four, a Lake Erie charter for four, a 3-day spring Ohio turkey hunt, a cooler full of fresh-frozen seafood from Florida, oil changes, hair cuts, sports memorabilia, golf packages, sporting events tickets, restaurant certificates . . . and the list really goes on and on.

Our excitement is increasing by the day for the golf outing and fish fry. And! It isn't to late for you to join us on Thursday night for the Escanaba in Da Moonlight production. That is sure to be a great time, too! Please contact me if you are still interested in tickets.

So, are you wondering how the Toad is actually doing? Last week chemo was pretty rough on him, and it took him much longer to recover than what he is used to. We know that Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday of chemo week are rough, and that is where we want it to end. The reality of it is that as his body weakens from the chemo, the recovery will get harder. And it is. Although he tries really hard to get up and go, I can see it in his eyes when he is tired. He gets pale, too, when his body has had enough and needs rest. For instance, our family went to the high school football game last Friday night. Johnny had already had a long day with work and 7th grade football practice. By the middle of the third quarter, he leaned over and told me, "Whenever you're ready." What that really meant was, "I'm ready." When we got home, I didn't like how pale he looked. He took some Compazine and Ativan and headed to bed. I try not to harp on him about doing too much because Dr. Ansari has told Johnny to push as much as he wants. His body really does tell him when he needs to stop. I try to allow that to happen and follow his lead on what he can and can't do. It is so hard, though. I want to protect him from everything: tiredness, nausea, obnoxious people -- and I just can't all the time.

We anxiously await our next session with Dr. Ansari. We will find out the results of the labs which will determine if the amount of chemo is going to increase. We will also be arranging the next set of scans. I think the plan is for another MRI and another PET scan, not sure about a CT. I'm anxious in both a good and bad way for that to happen. With the diagnosis of cancer, I think you are always waiting for something bad to happen, even when nothing has gone wrong. Johnny is as anxious as I am with all of this. He was even thinking about calling the office to find out the results of the labs, but then we decided that we wouldn't know what positive or negative would mean for us, so we decided to let it go until we are parked in front of Dr. Ansari.

It is interesting to experience the life we lead on a daily basis with the ever present cancer chorus playing in the background. It never leaves us, not even for a minute. I have to tell you, truly, it is getting old.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Just Another Normal Day

We have come to the end of another chemo week and it feels good. This was kind of a tough week for Johnny. On Wednesday he had to go in for the additional blood test and that really whooped him. He came home from that and pretty much slept the rest of the day. When he woke up on Thursday, he did feel much better, but still looked tired to me.

He pushed himself to get up and go on Friday and managed to work for a couple hours, attend football practice and then go to the high school football game that night. I know, I know, he should rest more. . . but the doctor told him to do what he can AND to actually push himself. So, even though I keep saying "rest" he keeps saying, "I don't have to." Fine.

Today was just pretty much one of those "normal" days. It started early with soccer pictures and a soccer game in Edwardsburg for Jake (which they won and Jake had a goal!!) then we split into two teams: one to go set up tree stands and hunting spots and the other to go shopping for jeans and shoes for Jake. No, I didn't go set up the tree stands -- Johnny always picks that one. Incidentally, Jake and I went to Kohl's where we found 5 pair of jeans for him in about 20 minutes. That has to be a new land speed record for blue jeans shopping. Then we headed to Dick's Sporting Goods where we sought out the latest and greatest in Under Armor shoes. Incidentally, why do shoes have to cost so much more just because he now wears adult size? That just makes me angry. BUT! I discovered today that a boy's size 6 1/2 is exactly my size so I got the latest and greatest in Under Armor shoes for boys, too. And ha ha, my shoes were $20 less than Jake's!

Johnny and Quinn worked hard out at Cal Jordan's farm to set up some additional spots for hunting. Johnny's life-long friend (and Cal's son) Jimmy and his son Tyler are coming up for the youth hunting season next weekend and Quinn is serious about getting Tyler a great spot for his first big hunt. They have set out field cameras and scoped out the area very well so that Tyler can be successful for this hunt. I think Quinn and Johnny are just as excited for Tyler to get one as he and Jimmy are. We are really looking forward to seeing them this weekend!

Of course, the activities of the day have worn out the toad (and the Mrs.!) and he is already off to bed for the evening. I am heading there soon myself.

Hope everyone enjoyed this gorgeous day as much as we did!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Wednesday at the Brawley's

Still quiet on the Brawley Front. Although Johnny wouldn't describe this round as "awful", it hasn't been the best, either. Yesterday was actually better than today, so we don't know if Wednesday will now start being the yucky day or if this is just a fluke.

Johnny had to go in to the infusion center today to have a special lab drawn while he was still on the 5-FU pump so that Dr. Ansari can determine whether or not he will increase the dosage at his next cycle. The trip in the car was a doozy for Johnny. He felt pretty good until they had to leave and once they got moving in the car, it just didn't agree with him. I happen to think it was probably MIL's driving, but who knows. . . Since then he has been pretty much wiped out for the remainder of the day. Still sleeping right now, and will for the rest of the night.

Even though he was queasy, he still managed to eat all three meals today and drink some fluids. Getting fluids down is always the hardest part for Johnny since he can't have anything cold. Imagine that, if you will. You are thirsty -- really thirsty -- and you absolutely cannot have anything cold to drink. It isn't fun because NOTHING satisfies a thirst warm, believe it or not. He is still sticking to warm lemon-lime Gatorade and warm red Kool-aid, and the occasional warm glass of water. He doesn't like the taste of coffee during chemo week (salty) and I even tried tea last night to no avail. Any suggestions on something we should try lukewarm that may satisfy his thirst? We are open to suggestions!

I think he is sick of me sniffing at him because, yeah, still smells like baby. I love that!

Ginger was here all day yesterday and today, and I so appreciate her. (Don't tell me I sound like a broken record; everyone should sing the praises of their mother-in-law!!!) Today was a loooong day for her. She arrived at 7:00 when I leave to take the boys to school and go to work, and stayed until after Jake's soccer game (about 7:30) so that I could be there for him. She worked a 12-hour day and got diddly-squat for pay!

I am starting to freak out a little about the Escanaba tickets, if you want to know the truth. Well, even if you don't want to know the truth. We still have MANY seats left. I would love to get an email from everyone reading this tonight to tell me that they need tickets . . . is that possible? I know that it is tough to get away on a school night, especially with sports and such. If you can work it into your schedule, though, we would so love to see all of our friends and family there. So, as a reminder the production is by the Elkhart Civic Theatre at the Bristol Opera House (just past Elkhart) on Thursday, September 24th. Doors open at 7, play starts at 7:30. Minimum donations are $10 each. If you would like tickets, please call me at home (269-683-0604) or email me (toad4mimi@aol.com) and let me know how many tickets you would like and the amount you would like to donate. It is really that simple.

Well, I am just about out of gas for the night. The boys are in their rooms, probably asleep because they are totally quiet. I still need to run to the store for milk for the morning and then I am coming home and going to bed myself. I wish the weekend started on Thursday!

Hope you are all taking care of yourselves and washing your hands frequently. Remember to sneeze/cough into your elbow, rather than your hands and at any signs of the flu -- STAY HOME! Seriously, people, give yourself and everyone around you a break and isolate yourself for a day or two if you are sick. You are doing everyone a favor, believe me. The Swine Flu is just the flu, but it does require you to take care of yourself. And please, if you have the sniffles wait for a while before you grace our home with your presence. We love you and love your visits, but I need to protect Johnny first and myself and the boys second. I may have to start screening all visitors at the door! Don't make me do it!

Thank you for all the continued notes, cards and calls. Most of all thanks for the prayers. I know they are working. Everytime Dr. Ansari reports on alab value, I can tell that the power of prayer is really at work.

Monday, September 14, 2009

State of the Toad

The fifth cycle is complete (well, except for the annoying little pump thing still attached). This morning we arrived at the infusion center with me saying my standard prayer for the port to please please please please please please work and what do you know . . . it worked. First time, too. No triple flushing, no special elixirs to clear it all out, no problems at all. I was relieved straight out of the gates. So was Johnny, and it showed in his blood pressure. Usually he is quite nervous about the port thing and his blood pressure shows it by being as high as the 180s. Today, with a cooperating port, his BP was a normal 118/70. Perfect.

We talked to Dr. Ansari about the State of the Toad. Things are looking good from his perspective. He really likes that the CEA is 13.8 and thinks that means the chemo is working well. We asked if it would at all be possible to do only 6 cycles before considering surgery. His reply: "Why would we do that? The chemo is working. Let's let it do its job." So, no such luck getting out of an additional 6 cycles. Actually, instead of getting out of them it looks like we will be kicking it up a notch -- BAM! Johnny goes in on Wednesday to have a special blood test drawn to see what his 5-FU levels are. Depending on the outcome of that, the dosage may possibly (probably) be increased at his next cycle. That may mean more nausea and/or vomiting with the increased dosage, but we really don't know that yet. Pray that it doesn't.

One of the questions that we've had for a while is: How long will we have to wait after the 12th cycle to have surgery. Obviously, we need time for Johnny's body and his blood counts to recover after 24 weeks of chemotherapy before we go cutting things out of him. According to Dr. Ansari, it will be 3-4 week's wait. That will give us time to meet and decide on a surgeon and make all of our travel arrangements. There will be a lot of logistics involved, so I am glad we will have the time off chemo to take care of everything.

Good news to report on his lab values for today! His platelet count actually went up. It was 116 last time and today it was a whopping 124. I think this may have been part of Dr. Ansari's decision to up the dosage, although I don't know it for sure. All of the other relative labs are still in the normal range, which makes me really happy!

While at the infusion center, we ran into an old friend from high school. Really, it isn't the place that you want to run in to old friends. I haven't seen Vince since probably high school, even though he lives locally. He was diagnosed two years ago with lung cancer and has been fighting a really hard battle ever since. The cancer had already spread to the bone by the time they found it, and has now found it's way to his brain. He and his lovely wife, Denise, and their three children are currently building a home here in Niles and hope to be moved in within the next month. He is a walking miracle, and I would like you to help us pray to God to allow him to continue to be that miracle. Like Johnny, his outlook is amazing and so positive. He was one of the only other guys in high school that would hunt/fish as much as Johnny and has had many hunting adventures in his life. . . many of which Johnny envies!

Incidentally, Vince went to the doctor to establish care with a new physician (much like Johnny) and told him of a "sissy cough" (Vince's term) that he had had for a while. He never expected it to be anything. Again, this is a good lesson for all of us. If you have something on your mind pertaining to your health, please don't hesitate to go to the doctor. What is the point of waiting? Seriously, there are two possible outcomes when you go to the doctor. It is either NOTHING, at which point you thank your lucky stars and leave with peace of mind. Or, it is SOMETHING, at which point you thank your lucky starts that you have found it and can now start dealing with it in an appropriate manner. Waiting gets you nothing at all. Sometimes waiting gets you something even worse than nothing at all.

Tonight I am going to bed thankful that we have found Johnny's cancer and are dealing with it appropriately. I hate that he has to go through all of this to get healthy again, but it is so worth it. As long as he can stay strong, I will stay strong with him.

I also go to bed praying for our friend, Vince, and his family; and for strength for our friend Matt, and his family; and for a whole host of new friends that we have met on this trip that we had no intentions of taking. But, since we are taking it, we may as well enjoy renewing old friendships, maintaining current friendships, and embracing the new friendships as they come along.

It is all about the friendships, people. And as James Taylor would say: Just shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel. Things are gonna work out fine if you only will. Shower the people you love with love, show them the way you feel. Things are gonna be much better if you only will.

Oh, great. Now I am going to go to bed with that song in my head, too. I probably won't be alone. :O)

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Pride in Parenthood

The Brawley Boys had quite the eventful day today!

Quinn and Johnny, as you know, are in the U.P. bear hunting at John and Ginger's place. I just received The Call . . . Quinn shot a very nice 200 pound black bear! This is his second bear and the biggest of the two. Johnny reports that the shot was perfect and the bear went approximately 10 yards after being shot. I asked Quinn if Johnny cried when he shot the bear (as he is known to do) and he said, "I was pretty proud of him, Mom, he held it together . . . mostly." I know the feeling!

Not to brag or anything (well, OK, to brag) Quinn is an amazing shot. Very rarely do we have to spend any amount of time tracking when he shoots something. I'm really proud of him for that. And I'm glad that he is a confident hunter at such a young age. Johnny has taken Quinn into the woods hunting since Quinn was 3 years old. No kidding. Quinn has always been that "old soul" kind of kid. Even at 3 he could sit still in a hunting blind, eating his Lunchable and drinking his juice box while waiting for a big buck to come in. He has hunted deer, bear, goose, turkey, dove, rabbit . . . you name it! I can totally see him being a DNR officer or something like that when he graduates college.

Jake had a pretty spectacular day today as well. He is playing on two soccer teams right now. One is "just for fun" with his friends in the Edwardsburg fall soccer league. The other team is the middle school team (6th - 8th grades) and they had their season opener tonight. Niles came out strong and beat the Brandywine team 6-2. Jake played a good amount and showed some very nice ball handling ability. He even had an assist for one of our goals. I was really proud of him for that. He was a bit nervous about playing with the "older" kids, but mixed in with them very well. It was a great game to watch and was so much more competitive than what we are used to seeing in the Optimist and Edwardsburg recreational leagues. I'm looking forward to the next game already!

Don't you just love days when you feel overwhelming pride for your kids? Me, too.

I hope you enjoyed your family today.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Finding Normal

Forgive me, Friends, for I have not written. It has been 6 days since my last post. (I'm not even catholic!)

Everytime I go camping I absolutely love it, but come home so UTTERLY exhausted that I always think I won't do it next year. Horse Hockey, we love it too much. I can't seem to shake the sleepiness of it, though, and it is already Wednesday. I think I need a couple more days off to recover. . .

Johnny managed to go to the campground (Twin Mills) with us on Thursday. I knew he wasn't feeling great yet, but he sucked it up and went anyway. He attempted to help set up camp, but really I prefer him to NOT help. I'm a little control-freakish in that way. I want to set up camp my way and in my time. In all actuality I never let him help set up -- just ask anyone who has ever camped next to us. So, it was all good. . . he rested and I set up camp.

I think he was surprised at his lack of energy until well into the weekend. I have to remind him that he is lowering his blood count with every round of chemo, and it is bound to take longer to recover each time.

We had the most amazing weekend camping with our friends. There were about 20 families from Niles that went to Twin Mills. Before we went, I sent out a message via Facebook to the people that I knew were going and mentioned that we should put together a Niles potluck on Saturday. So, those people told other's that were going, and so on, and so on. . . For the potuluck on Saturday evening, there were three picnic tables heavily laden with food, and 120 people! It was an amazing site. I was really quite proud of our little community gathering and hope that it becomes an annual part of our Labor Day Camping Weekend.

Johnny and Quinn left bright and early this morning to go bear hunting in the U.P. Yes, Quinn went to his first day of school and is now missing three days. There are learning experiences in many places other than the classroom, no? Tomorrow (Thursday) is opening day, and fingers are crossed that a very big (yet non-aggressive toward humans) bear comes in for Quinner to shoot. They have been baiting several places and all of the baits have been hit hard and often, so we know there are plenty of bears up there. I would just like it if one came home to fill our freezer! My dad and another friend, Herb, drove Johnny and Quinn up to the cabin. I know Johnny wasn't up to the drive, so it was really nice that Dad and Herb took them up. I just talked to Johnny a few minutes ago and he said that he basically laid around today after checking the baits. I can tell the drive wore him out.

I would like to thank everyone for providing meals since Johnny's diagnosis. To tell you the truth, we still have leftovers in the freezer and have had full bellies during times when we couldn't even think about preparing our own meals. The time has come, though, to get back to business as usual with our lives -- as much as we can, anyway. I have asked Lori Brawley to not schedule anymore meals for the time being. I may need to ask for help again after Johnny's surgery or if things start to get bad at any point during Johnny's chemo treatments. As I said in one of my earliest posts, the power is back on and we will turn to our friends (our generator) when the time is again right. I can't even figure out the proper words to use to convey our appreciation to all of you (and there have been A LOT of you!). I haven't told the kids yet, and I can guarantee you they aren't going to be happy! I may be calling some of you for recipes. . . new favorites have been discovered! Again, thank you, thank you, thank you. We love you all sincerely.

There are only two weeks left until the Escanaba in Da Moonlight production, and there are still plenty of tickets remaining. Please contact me soon if you are interested in attending. Send me an email (toad4mimi@aol.com) or a message via Facebook.

Golf Outing plans are coming together very nicely. Over 25 teams have already registered, but there is still plenty of room. Get your registration filled out soon!

Thanks for sticking with us on this journey. Our friends are truly what will get us through all of this. We certainly couldn't do it alone.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Mid-Range

Just like the last few cycles, Tuesday was Sleep-All-Day Day. His nausea remains under control (for the most part), so we are happy about that. He did say that this wasn't as good of a cycle as last time, but still much better than the first one. Mid-range, I'd say.

Wednesday is Remove-the-Pump Day, which is such emancipation for Johnny. He sleeps so fitfully with that thing attached, as do I. It has a little grinding sound every time it gives a morsel of medicine, which is every 45 seconds or so. It isn't loud, but you can definitely hear it. On Monday nights when Johnny is asleep, I use it as my sheep to count to try and fall asleep. Sometimes it works, but more often than not it doesn't.

He has remained pretty sleepy today, too. He has been up long enough to eat, rest on the couch for a bit and then usually heads back to bed within 30 minutes or so. We both know that the best thing for him is rest, so who cares if he has slept for 40 of the last 48 hours!

OK, how is this for a really weird side effect: You know how absolutely fabulous brand new babies smell? That "new baby" smell that just cannot be duplicated . . . not even Johnson & Johnson can bottle it, it is so good. When Johnny has his chemo treatment, he smells like a new baby. I thought it the first couple cycles, but kept it to myself. This time, I asked my mom and my sister to give him a good sniff. Seriously, he smells so good. I keep sniffing his head. Normally I don't think his bald head smells particularly inviting, but during chemo week I keep sniffing him. Especially when he is asleep and I can nuzzle right into that little spot where the neck meets the shoulder. Mmmmm - mmmm! I'd like to invite you all to give him a good sniff next time you are around him. Well, lets just make that during chemo week because the rest of the time, he just smells like regular old Johnny (which can be good/can be bad!).

We are leaving tomorrow to go camping (depending, of course, on Johnny) and will be home early Monday. We look forward to this camping trip for the whole summer! We only camp one weekend a year, and we certainly make it worth our while. It is such a great way to say good-bye to summer and hello to fall. (We are SO ready to say good-bye to summer -- you can't imagine how ready we are! ) It looks like the weather may cooperate with us, which would be the BEST THING EVER! Since we are tent campers, nice weather is especially appreciated. Thanks, God!

While we are gone, we would appreciate continued prayers!